martes, noviembre 02, 2004

And I Cried

Fuck! I am so upset right now! I couldn't care less if my eyes are mugto-mugto and... bleeh!

Why do some people think they're God?! They're not. But they think they are. That is so stupid!

If you're bossed around too much and you're not even their maid, of course you can't just sit around looking pretty while inaapi ka. No. No. I exploded. I fought back. I felt it was the right thing to do. I had to stand up for myself. I can't just let anyone boss me around when they don't even have the right. Ano ba ako sa kanila, anak? Hindi!

Tables were turned. Instead, those dorks got mad AT ME. Why so? They were, after all, the reason why I exploded. Fuck them. I should be the one to get mad AT THEM. I couldn't care either if they're family or not. I had to fight. And they not only bossed me around, they don't even CARE if they invaded my privacy. It's too much!

They made kampi-kampihan among themselves. And I was alone. My mom was out. Maky and I e-mailed eath other. She said to let it be because they were "family" after all. Some "family" (Sorry, I can't say it properly). I just can't. I'm hurt. My ego is bruised. I get hurt everytime I think about it. Maky also said that I might end up saying things I will regret later on. Did these dorks think before they said all those bad things about me? Did they even care if I got hurt with all the mean things they kept on saying? Me? Yes, I do think before I speak (Except earlier- I totally lost my mind no!) and I try to think of ways to say things without hurting a person but if there's no other way to say it then I'd just be blunt and say it.

And they had the guts to tell me that I DON'T RESPECT MY ELDERS? What the fuck to they mean? I DO respect my elders. I respect them a lot. Maybe they just misunderstood my respect for them but that's beside the point. It hurts. You're following their orders they had the guts to say that?! They keep on promising things in exchange but do I get them? No I don't. No. I just ask for simple things like Load and etc, and they can't do it? What kind of people are they anyways? Believe me, they are rich. Lucky for them. Ask anybody. I do respect elders. I respect my teachers even if I hate them because pinagtitiyagaan nila ako. I respect my Mom because I love her so much. I even respect my Dad, for heaven's sake. I am hurt.

And even if this may sound immaturish to you, I walked out. I just did. They continued screaming and yelling at me as if I'm just a stupid basurero who spilled an entire garbage truck onto a mansion.

And I cried.